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| July 28, 2010
(Click to listen live, or right-click and "save target as..." to download mp3) There is absolutely no need to worry about the possibility of marijuana becoming legalized in the United States. Legalization has about as much chance of getting passed as Gay marriage in California. It's not because people aren't supportive. It's just that the people that would support the ballot initiative will forget to actually get out to vote on election day. |
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| July 25, 2010
(Click to listen live, or right-click and "save target as..." to download mp3) Quitting smoking can be very challenging, and different people have different approaches. Some people like to go it cold turkey and others try to taper off until they're down to just a few smokes a day before stopping altogether. When it's the three year-old smoking two packs a day, however, just buy him some Nicorette gum and call it a day. |
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| July 20, 2010
(Click to listen live, or right-click and "save target as..." to download mp3) The next time you feel like someone needs to die because their car alarm starts going off incessantly all night long, you may want to consider the circumstances. If the real reason they can't get up to turn it off at that exact moment is that they're simply in bed with some hot chick getting laid, then maybe you can have a little more sympathy. After all, would you even want to get up to answer the phone? |
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| July 18, 2010
(Click to listen live, or right-click and "save target as..." to download mp3) The patient may be on the table, slit open with her guts hanging out...but that doesn't necessarily mean that it's over. We can rebuild her, make her better than before, stronger, faster... Wait a minute, we're not talking about the Bionic Woman here. The computer is on the fritz and we're putting her back together. It's just that it would be so much easier if we could tell her to take a pill and call us in the morning. |
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| July 7, 2010
(Click to listen live, or right-click and "save target as..." to download mp3) These days you just never really know where evil might be lurking, so you have to be vigilant at all times. Even if you've only stepped out to vote it's important not to let your guard down because the sweet little old lady that showed up to cast her vote that day may decide to fly her freak flag when she finds out that the number of voting booths for Democrats is larger than those for the Republicans. Call for backup. |
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| July 4, 2010
(Click to listen live, or right-click and "save target as..." to download mp3) Nicknames are all fun and games until someone gets them all mixed up and calls one girlfriend by the other one's name...all in front of the third one that the first one is having an affair with. If people would just stop naming their daughters who will eventually grow up to be Lesbians by the name of Sue...none of this would be a problem. Then we wouldn't need nicknames such as Finger, Moaner, Lips or Tweaker. |
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